Some times I think I need to start acting on my stupid thoughts.

I know, I know. It’s not like I don’t already. I’ve done some dumb stuff in my time, most of it un-sober although some actually came with full faculties flowing. Nothing that’s gotten me stuck in jail (talking with cops isn’t the same as jail time, right?), but still I’ve not always made the smartest decisions.

I wish I could do that with a business. You know, like the Snuggie?

I mean, sure. It’s kinda a good idea. Who doesn’t sit around on a chilly night outside, about this time of year, when you have the heat off and don’t really want to turn it on, so you grab a blanket and start to cover up. Everyone does it, right? And it would be better if you could cover everything up, including your arms, right?

But. There’s always a but. But, I mean, seriously. Come on. It’s fucking stupid. Who sits around and thinks, “Oh, man, I should make a blanket with sleves?” Obviously a guy or chick who’s pretty rich right now. Amazing.

The most unabashedly stupid business product I’ve seen in a while, I thought, was the Shake Weight. It may not have any sexual overtures, but the implication is there in every guy’s mind. And I don’t even know what that’s supposed to mean, but I’m sure every guy understands.

I can’t even image the jokes I’d have made if this product was on the market back in 1985 when I was 14.  Then again, I don’t know that I would have ever seen it because it’d probably be regulated to HBO on a Thursday between 1:30-2 a.m. And we didn’t have HBO at my house or trailer. My grandparents had it and about all that I was allowed to watch was Fraggle Rock, which, by the way, was awesome.

But things like this make money. Some, like the Snuggie, make someone rich. It’s crazy.

I thought I’d seen everything stupid out there, but somehow, this one has escaped me. The Snazzy Napper.

I had never seen it until today when I was watching some random All-Time College Football Plays on Fox Sports while I was on the treadmill.

I nearly fell off. Twice.

If you haven’t seen the commercial, make sure to watch it on the website.

It’s… amazing? Is that the word? I don’t know. It’s something.

The first time you really get a good shot of it, it’s on the plane with the chick sleeping in the seat. I swear when I saw it live, I really thought it was Morgan Freeman with his headband on during the escape scene from Robin Hood, Prince of Thieves.

I hope I never see one of these in the airport or on a plane. I’m guessing the shriek of laughter will set off some kind of Homeland Security alarm.

But what I do hope is that someday, somehow I become stupid enough to think of a dumb product that people might want to buy. It’s a stretch that I can be that stupid, but I’ll give it a shot.